Mother's Day is always an emotional one for me. I started my day with some serious baby snuggles while we waited for dad to get home from shift and then I headed to Barre3 for a workout. On my way home, I made my daily stop for coffee. As I was driving on the freeway, sucking down caramel syrup and crying, I reflected on how painful this day used to be for me.
The truth is, Mother's Day is such a joyous occasion for the majority, but for so many others, it is extremely painful. Whether you're a mom in waiting, an angel mama, a son or daughter who has lost their mom, a mom who has lost their child - it can be a day that's extremely hard to celebrate.
If you've read our story or follow chip&chisel on social media, you know I've been vocal about our past infertility struggles and that I have a huge place in my heart for those traveling the road we found ourselves on. That's why, even though I love to celebrate Mother's Day with all the love and laughter that my girls bring, my heart is still heavy for those that hurt on this day.
I came across this article this morning and it just hit home, so I wanted to share. Reading always helped me during a very difficult chapter in my life, so if you're someone that could potentially benefit from a quick read as well, I wanted to pass it along.
I know I'm on the other side of the struggle now and I feel truly blessed to have been given the two miracles that I call Addi & Livi, but the pain still feels fresh - no, it's not as intense as it once was, but I remember it like it was yesterday. It's a different kind of pain now, more that my heart hurts for others. I actually hope that I never forget these intense feelings as it was a journey that helped to mold me and grow my heart, if that makes sense.
If you take this day to hide out in bed, know that it's totally okay. I'm a very big "feeler of my feelings" (just ask my husband) ... there's nothing wrong with giving yourself time to feel and work through that. When I used to have a hard day, I would set a mental timer - sometimes it was an hour, sometimes a full day. I would allow myself that time to wallow, cry, and eat all the ice cream. After my allotted time was up, I would dust myself off and turn my focus to something else. I know that may not work for everyone, but it got me through some difficult times without completely falling apart.
If you're struggling today, I'm thinking of you.